1) New and improved resealable strips on frozen food bags, which are designed to tear away from the bag upon opening..
2) Migrating office supplies.
3) Metamorphosizing desserts in tv dinners:
a) chocolate brownies that change into armor plating when microwaved.
b) pudding that crawls up the sides of its compartment to invade the other sections.
5) When you cut your finger on a piece of porcelain that broke off the lid of the commode because you set it in a place which was rather precarious when you had to replace the float in the commode tank that you broke because you were trying to adjust it without realizing that it was fragile because of age, shoddy design, and the effects of long term exposure to hard water that tastes and smells funny and makes you wonder what was in it when you were rinsing off a cut finger in it.
8) Run-on sentences.
9) Houses designed with no electrical outlet in the only wall that will fit the entertainment center.
6) Poorly numbered lists.
7) Ancient rustbucket Volkswagen microbuses, with underinflated tires and covered in hippie bumperstickers, that belch more smoke and leak more oil in a block than my car does in a month. We'll probably have to drill in ANWR because of their waste. (NO OIL FOR HIPPIES!!!)
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