overheard

(updated - read the last postscript below)

three different quotes from three different places:

"they are working away feverishly - at the speed of government!"

"one main problem with child protective services is that they are incapable of distinguishing between abuse and discipline."

"the moral of the story is to not buy a car battery at 2am."

p.s. i wonder if these would be improved if they were said by someone else...

p.p.s. one more: "it's funny when the news puts a question mark in the title of a story. that's like saying "we have no idea what's really going on, but we're reporting it anyway"."

p.p.p.s. they're definitely not improved when spoken by orcs:

"they are workin' away feverishlee - at da speed o' guv'ment!"

"wun main problum wif sprog protectiv servicz izzat they are incapabul o' distinguishin' betweun abuse an discipline. Oww, da bigg wurdz make mi 'ed 'urt!"

"da morul o' da stoary iz ter nub buy a car baddury at 2be."

"s'funny wen da news puts a qweztun mark in da title o' a stoary. datz loike sayin' "weeb ab no idea woss rilly goin' on, but weez reportin' it anyway"."