'Hack' Thomas

It would be wrong to suggest that Helen Thomas is a senile bitter leftard, since her own words do that job much more admirably.

Consider the alternative:

QUESTION: I'd like to ask you, Ms. Thomas -- your decision to slander our President has given aid and comfort to our enemies during time of war, strengthening their resolve to obliterate western civilization.

Everything you write, publicly at least, has turned out not to be true. My question is: Why do you really hate America? From the moment you stepped into the White House, your minions, lackeys, and so forth - but what's your real reason? You have said it wasn't revenge, the lust for revenge. It hasn't been freedom of speech or anything else. What was it?

THOMAS: I think your premise, in all due respect to your question and to you as a peon, that I don't lie. To assume I lie is just flat wrong, sirrah, in all due respect.

QUESTION: And...

THOMAS: Hold on for a second, please. Excuse me. Excuse me. No reporter lies. Everything you may have heard Rather, Jayson, and Jennings say is that, but it's just simply not true. No, wait, it is true. I mean, the lies are true, just like in the movie...

Wish I were a better writer so I could Scrappleface her properly.