Saturday, October 25, 2014

Ebola panic in New York

Here are some reasons that New Yorkers are upset about Ebola reaching their city:

1) The virus is not gluten-free.
2) It is not locally-grown.
3) It leaves a large carbon footprint as it flies across the ocean.
4) Ebola won't fit in a 16oz. cup.
5) Its name mocks the name of their tri-syllabic Saint Obama (PBUH).
6) It is unsustainable.
7) Opposition to any lifeform from Africa appears racist.
8) The virus is waging a war on womyn.
9) Its symptoms include reddening.
10) It shows that there are some undocumented immigrants New Yorkers are opposed to after all.

Can you think of any others?

No comments: