Interview with Vader

and now you know . . . the rest of the story.

Salvo

Go read these four Cheat Seeking Missiles posts, these two at Discerning Texan, and a hopeful note at Dustbury.

Gitmo Serious

Recently I wrote this(hopefully) humorous bit about Amnasty Infernational's lies about Guantanamo Bay. No Oil For Pacifists graciously provided a link to that, and now has written a more serious (and link-filled) post about the specifics of the case. Go read.

is this a hoax?

self-forming clay robots... oh my

Down Mexico Way

A lawsuit has been filed by Mexican attorneys against a volcano. The class-action suit seeks 75 billion pesos in damages for false advertising, because while the mountain is named the "Volcano of Fire", its most recent eruption only produced lava and ash clouds.

:)

Cool!

NIF found this real cool computer case

Revenge of the Nerds

Take that, ya dumb jock!

(I'd apoligize to any dumb jocks reading this, but that would be like making an apology on TV to the Amish.)

:)

does anybody remember small government?

It seems that "interstate commerce" now means the use of any item for any purpose at any time, even if the item never crossed state lines.

As dissenting Justice Clarence Thomas warned, "If the majority is to be taken seriously, the federal government may now regulate quilting bees, clothes drives and potluck suppers throughout the 50 states."

"This is so unlike the French, they didn't surrender!"

Although a few are vulgar, most of the captions submitted for this contest are funny (like the one I stole to title this post).

Uhhh...

MTV's Daria used to have a running joke called "Sick Sad World". This is a perfect example.

they're baaack!

Le Sabot Post-Moderne is back from hiatus. The most recent post is about the Domino Effect.

Free Advice to the Fashionistas

The catwalks of Paris and Milan are no more fashionable than the cathouses of Peoria and Milwaukee.

(also see Miss O'Hara's related post)

The Feingolden Rule...

He who has the gold makes the rules, but less so on the internet.

Does anyone in their right mind think that this McCain/Feingold piece of insipid big-brotherism will do one single thing to stop the "monied interests" from having their voices heard?

Zimbabwe

Live 8, but how many dead? Mugabe's project of urban de-newal razed (among other things) an AIDS clinic for orphans.

Kerry's Grades

PlaidBerry has a top ten list of excuses for Kerry's college grades.

:)

ah, Bach!

Via Dustbury, news that a previously unknown Bach piece has surfaced.

news to me

apparently 500 TONS of yellowcake uranium and hidden centrifuge equipment has nothing to do with WMDs.

so purchase restrictions on ammonium nitrate fertilizer should be lifted, because they have nothing to do with homemade explosives, right?

and koresh's stockpiled weapons were no threat either... "Reno lied, kids died!"

Fisking Fisk

"Robert gets a bit windy from time to time."

storm names

In case you were wondering, here's NOAA's list of hurricane names through 2010.

Star Wars Politics

Lileks has many comments about the most recent Star Wars movie, including this one about Lucas' political projection:

Didn’t see all the political overtones, perhaps because I wasn’t in a mood to look for them. Expecting pithy pointy political insight from Lucas is like reading transcripts of Spongebob episodes to learn about perils and stresses on the marine ecosystem. But before the fight on the Molten Lava Planet – where any metal object exposed 24/7 can nevertheless be firmly grasped without incident – Darth says to Obi:

“You’re either with me or you’re my enemy.”

Obi sighs. The sun is behind him, so we know he’s in the right here. “Only Siths deal in absolutes,” he says.

Well, Obster, you’re not with him, right? And you’ve come to kill him, right? So Darth has a point. One might say that the Jedi failure to deal in absolutes, such as make absolutely sure Vader is absolutely dead instead of leaving him to bake like a tater tot left overnight in the broiler machine, might have served everyone well.

I also liked the bits about Yoda, the Wookies, and Coruscant apartment building codes.

Dirty Work

With no apologies to the Rolling Stoned, I present:

Gitmo
(The Ballad of the Amnesty International Moonbat)

----

I can't Gitmo
Sat-is-fac-tion
I can't Gitmo
Sat-is-fac-tion
Cuz I lied and I lied
and I lied and I lied
I can't Gitmo

When I'm watchin' CNN
And that man comes to the podium
Sayin' stuff I don't want you to know
About some factual information
With a military abbreviation
I can't Gitmo, oh no no no
Hey hey hey, that's what I say

I can't Gitmo
Sat-is-fac-tion
About Gitmo
All the facts shun
Cuz I lied, and I lied
and I lied, and I lied
About Gitmo

When I'm watchin' the BBC
And that man comes on to tell me
How Iraqis can be free
But that can't be a plan
'cause he does not hate
America like me
I can't Gitmo, oh no no no
Hey hey hey, that's what I say

About Gitmo
All the facts shun
Bald-faced lies will
Get more traction

When I'm lyin' the world
About Saddam, Bin Laden, and Arafat
And I'm parrotin' the terrorists
who tells me some guy whizzed on his book
or maybe gave him a dirty look
I can't Gitmo, oh no no no
Hey hey hey, that's what I say

About Gitmo
All the facts shun
Said they keep 'em
Gulag fashion
Cuz I lied, and I lied
and I lied, and I lied
About Gitmo

Anger

After work today, I really needed this...

GM commentary

The management at GM should stop and ask Miss O'Hara for directions.

God-Lite

NRO has an article on progressive vs. traditional church attendance.

This isn't the main point, but it's the funniest:

Many readers of the New York Post... were one morning shocked to read that former Beatle John Lennon had become a devout fan of none other than televangelist Pat Robertson... in the late 1970s Lennon had taken to watching Billy Graham on TV... one day, he had an epiphany — he allowed himself to be touched by the hand of Jesus Christ, and it drove him to tears of joy and ecstasy... Every other sentence out of John’s mouth was ‘Thank You, Jesus or Thank you, Lord.’”

...Lennon would not be the first popular icon to pursue, for a time at least, the traditional version of Jesus. Bob Dylan’s conversion to Christianity is well known, and appears to be intact. And last year, the London Spectator informed readers that Keith Richards, famed dope sponge and Rolling Stones guitarist, had seen the light, perhaps thanks to the influence of wife Patti, whom biographer Christopher Sandford calls a “devout Lutheran” and who attends a weekly Bible study and “won’t stand for swearing around the house.” At the time of their marriage, Patti’s parents told reporters that Richards is an “enthusiastic disciple of Christ” who had “embraced Christ as a way of life.”

And everyone thought Saul of Tarsus was a tough nut to crack.

Frisco's Freaky Fascists

San Francisco city council: above the law and beneath contempt.

WTC Memorial

MUST READ: Another attack is planned on the World Trade Center site.

Gimme That J-School Religion

Their special flavor of koolaid is called Watergatorade.

is dean colorblind?

heard on an imaginary streetcorner:

dean: "all o' you dang gops look alike to me."
crowd: "who you callin' cracker, cracker?"

Fallujah Update

Just in case you missed it on the evening news: Good news from Fallujah.

But here's some bad news from a real quagmire... ;)

i'm blinding you with science

Cool stuff via Yahoo Science News:

Dolphins

Bacteria

Acceleration (and related image)

odd aircraft

here's a site with info about lots of unusual planes.

Orwell, well, well

1984 is sooo last century.

who's winning?

Discerning Texan found this article about Al Qaeda's successes.

your tax dollars at rest

if i were an arab teen, and i saw this, islamofascism might seem a viable alternative.

fake but accurate

"I don't know for sure if Amnesty International is run by a bunch of crack-smoking tutu-wearing inbred squid-brained commie troglodytes, but it would be fascinating to find out."

Photos of the real Hattiesburg

As part of my attempt to apologize for the confusion caused by the blog name, here are some photos of the real Hattiesburg, and others from around Mississippi.

Islam

Wizbang would rather fight than switch, and wonders if the term "extremist" is applicable.

Nader's Believe It Or Not

I can't wait 'til someone slips on the ice in front of this place...

hahaha

oh i get it - global warming causes global cooling!

Islamic desecrations

Via LGF:

The OIC Spokesman urged the United States Government to live up to its responsibilities and not be lenient with the perpetrators of the desecration. He also demanded that those responsible for this despicable crime should be brought to justice immediately and that urgent measures should be taken to calm the tension in the Muslim world and ensure that such detestable acts are not repeated in the future.

and in related news:

The United States Government urged Islamofascists to live up to their responsibilities and not be lenient with the perpetrators of the beheadings, rape rooms, suicide bombings, genocides, brutality against females, and all manner of terrorist activity and barbarism. They also demanded that those responsible for this barrage of despicable crimes should be brought to justice immediately and that urgent measures should be taken to calm the tension in the rest of the world and ensure that such detestable acts are not repeated in the future.

Now, which warning do you expect to be taken seriously?

p.s. see Ed Driscoll's take on this topic.

June 5

Remembering the Gipper's accomplishments.

June 4

The anniversary of the Tianamen Square protest.

if only it were true

Scrappleface: Gitmo Study Sparks Arab Probe of Bible Abuse.

history lesson

i must've slept through more history class than i thought...

oh the poor poor guy

Saddam's morale is plummeting.

Guilty consciences can be such a bummer!

My first reaction was "Good!" My second reaction was also "Good!" My third reaction was "Maybe he'll feel bad enough to finally tell the truth about everything he did, and testify about all the euro-rats who were in on the oil-for-food scam."

Pardon me for being somewhat less than sympathetic to his plight. I'm still catching up from all those he killed.

Ben Stein

Here's Ben Stein's latest article on Mark Felt. Also, his American Spectator link has been added to the blogroll.

watergate

MSM is calling him a hero:

The Washington Post late this afternoon confirmed that W. Mark Felt, the former FBI official, was legendary Watergate source "Deep Throat."

So let's get this straight - one disgruntled employee gossips to two low-lifes about a third-rate burglary, and he's a hero. But hundreds of witnesses (like Vince Foster) with reams of evidence against the Clintons aren't?

Nope, no bias here. :P

UPDATE: what's it like in the universe where you live, mr. clinton?

EU oligarchy

A little revolution is good every now and then...

Star Wars as Space Opera

Lots of commentators and uncommontators complain about the 'wooden dialogue' in the Star Wars movies. So what? If the movies are meant to be space operas, why don't we compare them to other operas?

Believable dialogue is not the genre's strong suit. When was the last time anyone watched a performance of Ride of the Valkyries and believed the sincerity of the warrior praying to the warfather? Or that a crowd of Sooners joined in unison to sing praises to Oklahoma? Bugs Bunny gave a more convincing performance as the Barber of Seville than most operatic performers.

Give Star Wars a break on the dialogue.

Rehnquist to retire?

The sooner we have a Supreme Court vacancy to fill, the sooner we will see what "extreme circumstances" really are, and how hypocritical the "filibuster compromise" donks are.

Sad Old Dude

Hugh Hewitt: "Rather ended up making Nixon look like a model of candor."

Apparel-Sensitive

Check out these two styles of glasses.

Isn't it ironic that you couldn't see the ads if you were using the products, don't you think?

Once Upon a Time

This bedtime story has one happy ending, and we're left waiting for the second happy ending.

The Blues

donks are living in the past

question for youse guys

lately i've been making separate posts for all the unrelated random links that i find, rather than lumping them into a single post with the word 'random' in the title.

would you prefer i continue with making the separate posts, or go back to the big 'random roundup' format? please comment.

language lessons

Two sites have additions to the 'donktionary' - Brain Droppings and The Right Place.

smackdowns

Yet another good one by Donald Rumsfeld. (full transcript here)

Three good ones about Mark Felt.

UPDATE: Another masterful one by Ben Stein.

hmm

As I was waiting in vain for the Rangers' game to start last Saturday, I had time to wander around Ameriquest Field. There were lots of booths and kiosks selling a wide variety of items, but one kiosk surprised me. They were selling some sort of frozen tropical fruit drink, but the name of the stand was "Maui Wowie"...

uhh... "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

(for the sheltered among you, "Maui Wowie" is a nickname for a type of marijuana)

focus

Blue Goldfish has three posts focusing on current events:

Pacificism

Cause for War (including a description of a mass Koran desecration)

Enemies

prisoner abuse

Compare & contrast US and international prisons.

robots

unless the gizmo on top is a gun or a high-powered laser, this thing doesn't look like much of a guard.

p.s. but these things could be terminator's granddad.

projection deluxe

I only had to change a few words from this lunatic's quote to arrive at the truth:

Bloggers are under attack because we try to find stuff out. We are under attack because we say what we believe to be true. (Even more annoyingly, we are protected by the Constitution.) We are a reality-based institution standing up to an anti-faith media culture, and we are paying for it...

The problem is that we are fair-minded. We know that we make mistakes. We want to get better. The fair-minded have no chance against zealots. Zealots lie because the ends justify the means, and we say, "Oh, gosh, we're going to investigate and strive and improve." Are the zealots going to investigate and strive and improve? Of course not: They have an agenda, and the agenda does not include self-assessment. The zealots are working out of the Che Guevara handbook, friends.

well, there they go again...

still trying to stifle free speech.

don't forget the vorpal bunny!

If puppets and narwhals are outlawed, only outlaws will have puppets and narwhals.

extraordinary circumstances

The Therapist finds two other Senate sellou... er, compromises have been reached.

Clinton's Teflon Coating

Provided in part by the L.A. Times.

The 2nd commentor got it right: "The only problem is that there’s so much (Clinton dirty laundry) — the land deals, the politics, the business stuff - that it’s hard to keep it all straight."

LGF

Little Green Footballs is (are?) keeping track of "the religion of peace".

space image

Buzz Aldrin, one of the men who planted the U.S. flag on the moon, hopes to re-ignite children's interest in the space program:

Today's children don't have a realistic impression of space or space travel... (but) it's not the kids' fault. Those working in the fields of math, science and engineering — the people who were inspired by the accomplishments of Aldrin, Neil Armstrong and others during the space exploration boom of the 1960s and '70s — haven't reached out enough to capture the youngsters' interest.

It's a fine goal, but I don't think the first generation of space travelers started with a realistic picture of space travel either.

funny pic

I think the German translation of "Texas Limo" is "dachshorse".

EU-oui, that stinks!

Found via the Belmont Club's temporary HQ, TimesOnline's Tim Hames refers to the EU Constitution as "a cross between the Berlin telephone directory and the prophecies of Nostradamus" :) Read the rest.

science update:

Scientists mistaken about size of Andromeda galaxy by a factor of three, yet remain sure of global warming.

Prisoner Abuse

Why aren't we being shown this kind of torture photo as often as the Abu Ghraib photos? Could it be because they actually show prisoner abuse?

they've got to be kidding...

Via Emergent No, this story is good, but a few of my readers should be alarmed by the picture at the top.

red provence blue provence

Powerline has an interesting map of the EU voting results in France. Instapundit and No Oil For Pacifists have extended commentary and links.

randoms

Maybe this would be funnier if I had actually seen the show.

Joe Friday had it right.

Set the slaves free!

What was that about no connection between Saddam and terrorists? Hm?

No Oil For Pacifists takes on the dogmatic cult of secularism.

Can you pretend to be a blue-stater long enough to infiltrate the enemy?

These calculators are useful.

Go read PlaidBerry's Rules of Engagement in the Culture War, and the three previous posts.

Clientcopia has many amusing anecdotes of the technical- and/or design-challenged. Here are three of the latest.

"Please call back during normal business hours, unless you're already dead."

"What kind of idiot breaks a hole in the hull of his boat during a storm, just because he doesn't like the guy at the tiller and thinks the storm could have been avoided?"

Spoon's Filibuster Deal for Dummies.

Homepages for two American crop duster airplane manufacturers: Thrush and Air Tractor.

Photos of strange aircraft and toy planes.

Dustbury found this weird top ten list.

Paper starship models.

government, taxes, & theology

CrosSwords asks if anyone remembers the US Constitution.

Blasphemy Law?

If they pass this law...

condemning bigotry and religious intolerance, and recognizing that holy books of every religion should be treated with dignity and respect.

Whereas believers of all religions, including the Abrahamic faiths of Christianity, Judaism and Islam, should be treated with respect and dignity.

...the NEA and ACLU (and others of their ilk) will be illegal. Let's hope.

Also, this moral retard would be locked away because of his silly tantrums.

new words

According to ffwd, The Washington Post asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here is an edited version of this list;

Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very, high.

Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is, like, sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a totally serious bummer.

Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

this just in:

Scientists remain confused about water and sunlight, yet have no doubts about global warming.

bad gas

No, it's not the 99-cent special at Taco Quasar. ;)

Some Seattle gas stations were distributing bad gasoline. Could be a refinery problem, but given the environuts in western Washington state, I wouldn't be surprised if it was an act of eco-terrorism. Stay tuned.

my first political cartoon

Okay, so it's nowhere near Cox & Forkum level, and it could be cleaned up a lot, but here's my first ever political cartoon. Click on the thumbnail to see it full size.

new titlebar

i just made a new titlebar for the site. hope you like it!

if it displays wonky or you have trouble viewing it, let me know & tell me which browser and platform you're using.

random, etc.

If Newsweek had said that someone had burned a koran and beheaded its owner, would that have been okay?

Varifrank's indignation: foreign and domestic. (profanity)

Powerline wonders:

"Year after year, the American people vote for conservative candidates. But it just doesn't matter. You can vote for conservatism, but you can't have it. No matter who gets elected, government programs spiral ever farther out of control. And--especially tonight--one really wonders whether there is anything the voters can do about it."

Interesting synthetic materials.

"Think Kafka", in reverse.

short vacation

new posts soon...

worth waiting for

Bill Whittle of Eject!Eject!Eject! has a new essay: Sanctuary - Part 1 and Part 2. Go read the whole thing.

Duuude, that's eeevil...

Go read "The Case for the Empire" and "Star Operation Freedom" (mild profanity, major weirdness).

pop culture revisionism, pt.1

Grease is not the word.
It has neither groove nor meaning.
Grease is not the time, nor the place, nor the motion.
It most certainly is not the way we are feeling,
except after eating the 99-cent special at Taco Quasar.

Ralphie coins a phrase

For those of you living in a cave (what are you doing with internet access?), there's the slang term "old school". Paralleling "back in the day", it means passe, obsolete, old-fashioned, as in "We knew about that years ago when I was in school".

In light of Rathergate, Eason Jordan, and Korangate, Hugh Hewitt coins a similar phrase "old media", which implies bogus, slanted, or poorly edited material. As in "No way could that be true, dude, that's so old media". Or "She didn't say that - you heard the old media version".

Use it early, use it often.

Liars Exposed II

IMAO observes that "Newsweek has blood on its hands, and directly caused more deaths with their single lie than any of the "torture" done by the photo-happy dopes at Abu Ghraib". Doesn't MSM have a wonderful set of checks and balances?

---

UPDATE: Reporting about the Newsweek scandal, our local news just said the magazine "is worried that the damage may be irreversible." Here's a scoop for those fact-challenged morons: DEATH IS IRREVERSIBLE, AS IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN. YOUR WORDS CAUSED SEVENTEEN DEATHS, AND NOTHING YOU SAY CAN REVERSE THAT.

That insipid line was followed by George Stephanoppulagus doing his well-practiced song-and-dance trying to shift focus away from the real issues. I've got another scoop for them: YOUR "APOLOGY" IS PATHETIC. BY YOUR EVASION TACTICS, IT IS OBVIOUS THAT YOU HAVE NO REGRETS, EXCEPT THAT YOU DIDN'T GET ANY PHOTOS OF THE CARNAGE.

---

UPDATE 2: Too little, too late.

---

UPDATE 3: We wish...

We also wish "more Americans would actually think about the harm these draft-dodging little Trotskyites have done to this country with their tireless campaign of hatred against conservatives."

---

UPDATE 4: "Even if (flushing the koran) did happen... what of it? Does that constitute some sort of Geneva Convention violation? In view of the hand-chopping and rape rooms of Saddam Hussein, maintaining that argument borders on the macabre."

---

UPDATE 5: Don't blame the Pentagon, Newsweek, we know what you did.

true colors

Molten Thoughts on 'Sheets' Byrd and the new KKK:

Perhaps Klansman Senator Byrd will have his last hurrah inveighing against another black American who won't sit down and shut up when told to do so by white Democrats. Perhaps black Americans will return to the Republican fold to some small extent, and thus force the Democrat leadership to do more than take their votes for granted. Either way, I enjoy seeing the Democrat facade on support for racial and ethnic minorities torn down whenever a hack politico smells fear.

so many mudslingers...

Notice the dig on blogs in this story about a Castro speech.

Speaking for up to four hours at a time, Castro thunders with indignation and laughs at the absurd as he reads the news before a live audience of Communist officials, occasionally pausing to flip through a scattering of papers in front of him hunting for a quotation.

The result is remarkably like a televised version of an Internet blog, references to outside news sources tightly wrapped in personal commentary.

The article is remarkably like a corporate version of an Internet blog, references to outside news sources tightly wrapped in personal commentary.

I'm not sticking up for Castro. Ambos lados son ridículos.

state of the nation

Confederate Yankee has two serious reads about the state of the nation.

and now for something completely different...

Marla Swoffer found this: Doubly Positive.

Speaking of...

desecration:

you people eat it for breakfast on your corn flakes. You use your mosques and holy sites as munitions dumps, you use then as sniper nests. So what’s a little water on a copy of your holy text?...

If the US wanted to desecrate a holy site, dontcha think they could just launch one of those nuclear missiles at Mecca? That would get your attention pretty quick now wouldn't it? So what's stopping the yanks? Oh, it's that common decency that those 'infidels' have in their religion... it's something you might want to check into...

Liars Exposed

(Newsweek commentary has been updated and moved to a new post.)

"In the name of multiculturalism, Europe will lose the culture that made such an idea possible."

How shady it is that our modern leftists and peaceniks can detect fascism absolutely everywhere except when it is actually staring them in the face?

You should see what's in Harry Reid's file...

A dem-witted and misleading billboard.

C-BS just never learns.

When they're not lying outright, they're just perpetually wrong.

the randoms, again

Support Cuban Liberty.

Check out these before-and-after maps of gay "marriage" state referendums.

He's back. He's on his way back. Unfortunately, Meathead's back too.

Makes me almost miss Clippy (especially the language) . . . And, heads up Gates, Windoze won't last either.

Can we PLEASE get serious about border security?

History is written by the winners, but it's rewritten by losers.

Al-QaBoom!

The left is not entirely a death-cult.

Jeopardy - Special Edition: CNN

Correction: Liberal journalists are extremely annoying, LaShawn.

Insurgents? Insurgents?!? We don't need no steenking insurgents!!

Downtown Fort Worth

I miss Leonard's Subway.

Leonard's Department Store used to have a subway line to shuttle customers to their downtown Fort Worth store from a free parking lot by the Trinity River. Here's a picture of one of the original cars. Those cars were replaced by these tres-70's cars when the Tandy Center was built. The subway line was closed three years ago, in part due to low ridership, and in part to build the new Radio Shack headquarters.

UPDATE: Here's four more pages of Leonard's/Tandy's subway images, and more about Leonards Brothers history. I also made a correction - the subway closed in 2002, not last year.

The downtown courthouse is magnificent. Its addition is wretchedly, monstrously, and hideously abominable.

Don't get me started on the Firestone Apartments, though. The fat-cat developers (which were likely in cahoots with the city administration) booted my great-aunt out and bulldozed the house that the family had owned since the mid 30's. Grrr. Eminent domain, my pinkytoe.

(p.s. Here is the home page for the architecture links.)

good points

Varifrank measures up the UN, and finds it lacking. (mild profanity) Also read this chilling tale of crushing of dissent in old LA.

Dustbury finds value in rural people.

Educational Materials For Sale

"Learning Multiplication" textbooks. $10 each. Two for $25.

short week

Due to some minor eyestrain, I need to take a bit of a break from all non-essential CRT radiation. So there will be little or no blogging for the rest of the week. Here's a few links before I go:

Newspapers in decline, women and minorities hit hardest.

That 90's show is in reruns.

Huff Mommy & the Too Dim Crew made "a great new laundry detergent to replace Windex."

The Church of Gaia is a hall of mirrors.

Compare and contrast.

It's a good idea, so it won't be considered.

It's a bad idea, so it's a shoo-in. Next step: barcode-on-the-hand-and-forehead. Count me out.

Two from vodkapundit: fisking robertson and bogus bailouts.

Warning: Do not take this drug internally. Do not operate heavy machinery, kitchen utensils, dice, or pencils while under the influence of this drug. Halitosis may reach toxic levels while using this drug. Prehensile tail growth and pancreatic spasms are usually mild to moderate. Do not use if you are pregnant, dormant, flippant, or adamant. Capsules may escape the body supersonically from between fingers, toes, and ribs. This drug may cause dizziness, insomnia, narcolepsy, bulimia, inflammation of the knees, swelling of the earlobes, uncontrollable sweating, triskadekaphobia, and spontaneous limb loss. Take one capsule six times daily. Ask your doctor if this drug is right for you.